Be still

Be still, and know that I am God.

Be still?  I've been doing that quite a bit these days but lately I've been struggling with it, God.  You know me so you know things are going pretty well, but my tendency has always been to look to the next thing...

Be still, and know that I am God.

...like when my freaking hydrangeas are going to bloom.  Everyone else's have and although I give mine water and food and didn't overprune them and planted them in part shade, they just sit there with that outside ring of flowers while the inside cluster obstinately refuses to do anything which, now that you remind me, sounds a lot like my children...

Be still, and know that I am God.

...who aren't really listening to me these days, either.  The little one just looks at me when I tell him to do something and laughs and says that he's a baby dolphin which he might as well be because at least then I wouldn't have to deal with the problem of getting the child to poop IN THE POTTY and the big one continues to have his meltdowns and probably will  never learn to write or color in the lines like his teacher wants him to and there always seems to be some issue to deal with...

Be still, and know that I am God.

...but these issues pale in comparison to the problems others are facing, like the one whose husband is traveling all the time while she sits lonely at home with her toddler and newborn baby, or the one who is trying to keep the bitterness at bay because she just wants to have a baby and can't, or the one who just wants a husband but had all hopes of that dashed with last month's breakup, or the one whose family member's pain has turned out to be cancer and the only course of action is to make every day count from here on out, and I just want to help these people but there's so little I can do...

Be still, and know that I am God.

...which puts everything in perspective, of course, but I can't help thinking about THE INJURY and about how everything was finally feeling really good so I decided to go out for a spin on my bike, which was amazing but later on in the day I again felt THE INJURY so I have no choice but to wait some more and I know you've been teaching me a lot during this time but I'm getting really impatient and just want to go out and get MOVING, for goodness's sake--

BE STILL, AND KNOW THAT I AM GOD.  I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth.  And don't forget: I, the Lord Almighty, am with you; I, the God of Jacob, am your fortress.

....